Breathe. Cope. Do.

Bad day, going home to turtle after work. So much chaos at my job. I’m forgetting things, not just since medication started but before then when I was still coming to terms with all of this and what it’d mean and did I really need medication and all of that. I’m setting my people up to fail by being this scattered and I hate this feeling. I feel stupid when I’m this distracted. I get tense. My shoulders start creeping up to my ears and my head hurts and I grind my teeth so hard I’m half afraid they’ll crack. I get so stressed out about forgetting that I forget more things and I need to get a handle on this now.

 Need to write things down. Need to write everything down.

 Tomorrow. Tonight we turtle. Hot bath. Good book. Glass of wine. No phone.

 (Still rash free, btw.)


About braineatsbrain

Recently diagnosed with bipolar. Twice. This is where I'm going to try to make sense of that. Expect introspection, unfocused anger, and random art.
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1 Response to Breathe. Cope. Do.

  1. Yay, no rash.

    I console myself about my compulsive list-making by knowing that everyone gets frazzled and forgets shit sometimes, and that it’s a perfectly reasonable habit for anyone to cultivate, and nothing anyone would think (too) weird if you were to be a bit publicly obsessive about it. I get Field Notes notebooks by the gross tonne because they fit even in ladies’ back trouser pockets, and because the covers are sturdy and I can (TMI ALERT) sweat like a pig and the covers still stay intact, even if they get a bit damp. They’ve gotten kind of a stupid hipster rep I find regretful, but they’re still well-made. : )

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